Do not seek victory in contention. Instead seek not to contend. A practice of non-contention eliminates the danger of victory or defeat. The sapling survives the storm by not contending against it. It goes against the grain of our culture to practice this. Non-contention is often seen as a weakness, yet it is truly the greatest strength. Do what you have to do with a gentle heart and things will take care of themselves. There is no need to contend. Contending brings only suffering. No one wins all the time. Be flexible like the sapling and survive. By not contending, you are truly the winner. Competition is a slippery slope that can lead down to a ravine of suffering and churning rapids.
Every step we take is a result of the previous one. It can be good or bad. The next one can be either one too. Good karma results from taking good steps. Please be careful to take as many good steps as you can. Sometimes a misstep only leads us slightly astray. However, sometimes it can lead us in a whole new unhealthy direction. Once we get going that way, it is difficult to stop. It is like a stone rolling down a hill. That is why it is better to concentrate on what steps we are taking. Are they helpful or will they lead to hurt?
A simple practice to help stop procrastination can take place the first thing in the morning. When the alarm rings, get up. Do not dawdle or press the snooze button. When the alarm rings, you get up. A simple practice like this can help us with other things. When it is time to do them, you do them. Sometimes the things we have to do are good or not so good. It does not matter. It is best to do them when it is time. There is a story of a monk working out in the heat of the day in a field. A passerby stops and asks him “Why are you working out here now when it is so hot?” The monk replies “Why would I be anywhere else?” When it is time to work, work. When it is time to play, play. When it is time to wake up, wake up.
How do we deal with anger? We must have a healthy way of coping with it. Repressing the anger we feel only leads to a volcanic explosion somewhere later. In my view, we cannot simply choose to try to hide it. It is inside of us, waiting to come out, waiting for the opportunity to show itself. Meditation helps but just thinking about whether our anger is going to help or not is what we need to ask ourselves. Usually, the answer is no. Anger may make us briefly feel better as we ‘let off steam’, but the steam can burn us or someone we care about. Every moment spent in anger is a moment spent away from tranquility and the path we seek to walk. Peace lies not in the world, but in one who walks the path. Learning to deal with anger keeps us peaceful even when things happen that we do not like.
The archer, the arrow, the bow, the target. All separate but in a perfect universe all are one. Wherever we see ourselves separate from other things, we are deluded. Everything is one. Many little cogs in a huge machine. This does not mean we are insignificant, only that we are united with all the other cogs. To hit the bulls-eye, the archer must unite all the components to be successful. If one is lacking, he will not be. He must unite all to achieve a harmonious result. To live in harmony, we must seek to understand this oneness. When we create this and that, we have created walls. There really is no this and that, it is only a wall the mind has created. Knocking down these walls is essential to a good practice. Seek out the wisdom of the Tao to do so.
Sometimes I feel homesick. I had many homes growing up. Sometimes you would just like to go back and relive old times. Be with loved ones or friends that have since died. That of course is a hopeless dream. It has been said that you can’t go home again. You can of course, but even if you did, things would be different. My hometown is vastly different from when I grew up. Most of it was new and unfamiliar to me the last time I visited. Everything is subject to impermanence. The familiar becomes strange and vice versa. That is the way of the Tao. The best we can do is create a wonderful home wherever we are standing. It has been said that no matter where you go, there you are. No matter where we are standing now, if we have practiced well, we are home and there is no need to be homesick.
Death does not sound a trumpet. You do not know when it is coming. All we can be sure of is that it is inevitable. Thoreau on his death bed remarked to a visitor “You are as close to death as I am.” One minute here, the next not. Death confuses, it frightens. However, think of this, before we die, we do not know that perhaps death is the doorway to the greatest joy. If you follow the way of the masters, there should be no fear. Death is not the end, but just a continuation. As life ends, we begin new journeys.
One type of meditation that is popular is candle flame meditation. This is a well known, traditional and very simple form to practice. After lighting a candle (make sure it is one that you can see the flame easily, not a big jar candle), light the candle and set it in front of you about 12 to 18 inches away. You can also light some incense too. Sit down in a comfortable posture or reclining position. I prefer to set the candle on the floor and then sit and gaze down upon it. Breathe normally and relax your body. Turn your attention to focusing on the flame. Just relax and quietly watch it flicker. Do not intensely stare or over concentrate on it. Notice the flame as it moves with the gentle air currents. See the flame’s reflection in the puddle of melted wax beneath it. Remember to breathe naturally as you are watching the candle flame. You want to maintain a relaxed state of mind an body during the meditation period. Sometimes you will find yourself lost in thought or concentrating on something else. This is natural, so just return to focusing on the flame. Perform this meditation for as long as you like, but do a minimum of fifteen minutes. Candle flame meditation is helping you train your mind and body to release tension, and learn attention and focus.
It is said that a man who hurries does not walk with dignity. I see people all the time hurrying, rushing, sometimes rudely, in front of others. They remind me of children saying “Me first!” Of course as adults they should know and behave better. When we go about our day, we should seek grace in every step we take and dignity with every action. We can lead others by being behind. There are times that call for us to hurry, but most of the time we find ourselves the victim of false hurry. Hurry leads to worry, mistakes, and discord. The butterfly measures its life in moments, but still has plenty of time.
We may stand to inherit many things from our parents. We often think of the financial part. However, more importantly is the inheritance of character and ways. Some people simply follow the same path as their parents. If their parents were abusive, the children may be likely to follow. If the parents set bad examples, the children watch and repeat in many cases. If you are a parent, remember your child looks to you for guidance. If you guide them well, they will have a much better chance at happiness than if you are careless or indifferent. Make sure the inheritance you pass on is one of value.
